in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6
This scripture was ingrained into my heart and mind by my youth leader and friend, Mrs. Teresa Sauce. I'm pretty sure she wrote it on every card and note that she ever signed. I think that it's finally beginning to sink in a little...maybe.
You see, I've spent the last month or so trying to "figure out" what the next step for me is.
I just got impatient and kept making up all these ideas and all these plans.
I could move to that place and minister to those people...
I could live in this place and work at that job...
I could date this guy and live this life...
I could work this job and pay off these loans...
I could live with this person and do this thing...
My goodness! How many plans does a girl have to make and break before she finally gives up, and gives in, to the Lord.
"Lean not on your own understanding..."
Our society and culture tell us to figure it all out and have a 5 year plan and go to school, get married, start your career, have babies, get a dog, nice cars, big house, TV in every room, fill your schedule with this and that and don't relax or breath unless you're sleeping or on vacation or dead.
They tell us to live for the here and the now, to store your treasures here on earth, where theives break in and moths destroy.
"Lean not on your own understanding..."
Something I love about God is the way He deals so spontaneously with me. He must know I get bored or fall asleep if I sit still for too long. He's always keeping me on my toes, always keeping me guessing expectantly.
Honestly, the biggest decisions I've made in life, I haven't had to spend much time praying about. So far, he has just spoken to me or opened the door and I just know what to do next. He gives me more peace about the right option than the other option. And He always provides. Always.
He guides my feet, one step at a time.
For example:
Go to LaTech (flipped a coin)
Spend the summer in Indonesia (took the open door)
Go to Ghana (said yes)
Move to Utah (working a wilderness therapy job that I found through google!)
Quit that job and work at a homeless shelter in Colorado (unexpected change of plans in a day)
Nanny Miles (so fun!)
Go back to Ghana (totally a God thing)
Then go to Uganda
Work in Ruston, live in Georgetown (what!?)
Move to Uganda
All of this, the last seven years of my life, God has made each and every step of the way so abundantly clear at just the right moment.
"Lean not on your own understanding..."
And hasn't he been so faithful to me!? Each step of the way, I've always had money, food, clothes, a car, and housing. Even friends! I have never been in need.
When I went to Tech, I didn't know I would end up living in Uganda. I didn't need to know!
I don't know 2 steps ahead of me now, and I don't need to know!
All of this to say, and maybe I'm just talking to myself here, quit trying to "figure out" the next five steps of your life and just focus on the path you're on right now. God knows what we need. He's got this under control. He will let us know what's next at just the right moment. It's always our faith that is lacking, never his provision.
"Lean not on your own understanding..."
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